Gratitude, part 2

It is 5:30 am and, in my dreams I begin to hear the sounds of you waking for the day, reminding me that you are an entire little human being with your own wants and needs. Through my foggy brain I try to rouse myself to get myself going for the day.

I try to remember, but it is hard: I am so grateful for this.

And later in the morning, when I walk into your daycare center, you're greeted by happy, loving caretakers. I hand you over to them so that I can continue to do the work that I'm good at and helps our family. In my morning rush, I should take the time to remember, but sometimes forget: I am so grateful for this.

And in the afternoon, after I've had a chance to exercise or run errands, I pick you up at daycare and you smile and give me a nuzzle. My mind is rushing ahead to dinner and chores that need to get done, so I don't always get a chance to say: I am so grateful for this.

Four years ago, I didn't know that I'd have a family and home. Didn't know I'd ever snuggle with my own little baby. Didn't know that I'd get to witness firsthand the beautiful unfolding of newborn to baby to little boy.

I am so grateful for this.

And after everyone is well-fed, and you've had a bath, and I'm singing you your lulliby, sometimes I'm still too frazzled from my day to think: I am so grateful for this.

But sometimes, I sneak back into your room, after you've fallen asleep, to check on you and see your sweet sleeping face and hear your peaceful breathing. And I always remember: I am so grateful for this.