Juhu Beach, Mumbai. Walked around the beach last night after our arrival. So many families out to get some fresh air at the beach, little boys playing cricket, a festive atmosphere of balloons, otton candy, colorful saris, and sunset on the Arabian sea. We felt very uncomfortable being followed by children and women trying to beg from us – they speak good enough English to know just what to say to appeal to your sympathy, and are extremely persistant. Very hard to say ‘no.’
We had a lot of serious conversations about what a weird way this is to have a baby. Adam admitted that he really didn’t think we’d follow through on this idea, and admitted his doubts and fears about going forward. I felt like dorothy falling into a feverish dream of Oz, seeing the world suddenly in reverse from the world she'd previously known. I know Adam wasn’t paying as much attention to all the plan that I was making. He always had something more immediate he was focused on: School things, the Olympics, going Jeeping. I pressed on because I thought that he had agreed to the plan; maybe I should have paid more attion to his disinterest. His doubts started to plant the seeds of doubt in me, too -- do I really want to be a mother, or do I just think I do? I'm beginning to think: "You can lead a horse to water, ....
We do have lots of questions for the doctors -- what kinds of genetic testing are allowed? How much screening is done of the egg donor's medical and mental history? What is our probability of pregnancy? Will they allow us to reduce twins to a singleton? What is the prenatal nutrition/diet plan for surrogates?
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